It’s Possible to Love Someone You Don’t Know

Yesterday at Glasgow city centre, a candlelight procession took place to pay tribute to a Nigerian artiste who had recently passed away. As a presenter for a local radio station, I found myself in the unique position of covering the event. Little did I know that an unexpected encounter with a stranger would lead me to contemplate the profound concepts of love spreading and the influence of collective admiration.

During the event, I had the opportunity to interview a stranger, Muhammad Ali, an individual from Uganda who, surprisingly, had no connection with the Nigerian music culture and was unfamiliar with the deceased singer. Our conversation took an unexpected turn as Muhammad shared his perspective on love and admiration, shedding light on a remarkable human phenomenon.

Finding the picture of the Nigerian artiste, Mohbad, on Muhammad's scooter, I enquired about his association with the late musician. Muhammad's response was simple yet profound. He explained that despite not knowing Mohbad's story, he felt compelled to love him because the majority of people around him loved him. In Muhammad's eyes, their shared racial background was enough for him to feel a deep connection with the artiste.

Muhammad's words resonated with a powerful truth — the ability of love to spread based on how a majority perceives an individual. His genuine affection for Mohbad stemmed from the overwhelming love he witnessed from others. He acknowledged that although Mohbad was no longer alive to witness the outpouring of support, the collective love and admiration demonstrated by the crowd was a testament to the impact the artiste had on countless lives.

In Muhammad's view, he didn't have a choice but to love Mobad. This makes me realize that when we encounter a person who is widely adored, the love they receive becomes contagious. It transcends personal preferences or individual knowledge of their story. It is almost like an involuntary response, driven by the realization that when so many people love someone, there must be something remarkable about them, and this makes me realise how possible it is for us as humans to love somebody we don't know.

My Ideal Home Design Vision

When I envision my dream home, there are a few key features that I believe would make it truly unique and functional. One aspect that I feel strongly about is the concept of open living spaces. I believe that the only rooms that should have doors are the bedrooms, as these are the spaces where privacy is most needed.

For instance, I don't see a need for a door leading to the master bathroom. After all, it's an en-suite bathroom meant solely for me and my wife. Who else would be using it to take a shower? By eliminating the need for a bathroom door, we can create a seamless flow and an open, airy feel within the space.

Many people underestimate just how much time can be saved with a studio home design. Also, by removing unnecessary barriers, such as doors, it becomes easier to see, hear, and digest what is happening around us in a family setting. For example, in an open living room, it would be nearly impossible for my daughter to sneak a man in through the kitchen backdoor without me noticing. This type of design encourages transparency and communication among family members.

Another important aspect of my dream home is having the master bedroom located on the ground floor. This allows me to stay connected to the foundation of my home and be aware of everything happening on the ground floor. I believe that anyone coming in late at night would have to enter through the ground floor, making it important for me to hear the sound of their arrival. By having the master bedroom situated downstairs, I can maintain a sense of security and awareness in my home.

Furthermore, I would love to have the entrance to the pool and outdoor recreation area directly connected to the backdoor of my bedroom. Why would I want to climb stairs every time I want to enjoy a simple moment of relaxation? By seamlessly integrating the outdoor space with my bedroom, I can easily step outside and unwind without any unnecessary hassle – feel free to call me lazy. Lol

I must acknowledge that my imagination knows no bounds. Finding an architect or real estate consultant who can bring my vision to life may be a challenge because they will need to have an open mind – wish me luck!

Your Weakness is in Your Patterns

In life, we all have our strengths and weaknesses. Some weaknesses are inherent to our character, while others stem from the patterns we create in our lives. It's these patterns that can leave us vulnerable to being taken advantage of, as people begin to anticipate our reactions to certain situations. This knowledge gives them an edge in planning their next moves, without us even realising it. But here's the thing – our weakness isn't in who we are as individuals, but rather in the predictability of our patterns.

It's easy to blame ourselves for falling victim to manipulation or exploitation. We might think we're too nice, too troublesome, too vigilant, or too nonchalant. But the truth is, it's not about our personality traits. It's about others understanding how we would react in any given situation and using that knowledge to their advantage. This dynamic exists in every type of relationship, from friendships to romantic partnerships to professional connections.

But here's where things get interesting. I believe that each one of us is equipped with multiple personalities. Now, before you start thinking I'm suggesting we all have some kind of split personality disorder, let me explain. When I talk about multiple personalities, I'm referring to the different aspects of ourselves that emerge in different situations.

Think about it – we're not the same person when we're hanging out with friends as we are when we're in a professional setting. We adjust our behaviour, our tone, our mannerisms to fit the context. This ability to adapt is a strength that not everyone fully embraces. Those who are the strongest understand how to choose which personality to call upon in different situations.

Let's consider an example. Imagine you're someone who is known for always giving in to demands, never saying no, and always putting others first. Your kindness and willingness to help might be seen as a weakness because people know they can manipulate you. They know that by pressing the right buttons, they can get you to do whatever they want. But what if you were able to recognise this pattern and choose a different personality on this given occasion? What if you could tap into your assertiveness and set clear boundaries? Suddenly, the power dynamic shifts, and you become less susceptible to being taken advantage of. This is also applicable in situations where you have those who deliberately just want to get on your nerves.

The key here is self-awareness and the conscious decision to choose the personality that aligns with the situation at hand. It's about recognising the patterns we've fallen into and breaking free from them. Be it a good character or a bad one wee possess, it's about reclaiming our autonomy and taking control of how our actions and reactions affect us and those around us.

Of course, this isn't an easy journey. It requires introspection, and a willingness to step out of our comfort zones.

Ask yourself if there's a different personality you can tap into to alter the dynamic. Remember, your weakness isn't in who you are, but in the predictability of your patterns.